DEALING WITH CODEPENDENCY IN A RELATIONSHIP

ScanFACT: Can someone with an addiction be loved? Yes they can, but from a far. Although the fog in their brain dose not allow them to feel you nor give back that same love, but you keep trying. FACT: At the end of the day nothing matters to them but that drug. And as long as they are chemically dependent they (your addict) are numb to life.

What is codependency? It is an emotional, psychological, on set of oppressive rules. You know live for self. You become a hired hand for your addict. You become his or her personal banker, housekeeper, defender,doctor, care taker, baby sitter,personal chef, and the duty list gets longer. His or her only job is to get high  and scheme.  He /she live, and breath to get high. He /she is no longer the sober man/ woman you started this beautiful relationship with.

You have slipped into codependency and ready to become your addicts savior. You see standing before you the person you so love. Keep in mind he is only draped clay, still appearing visibly the individual in your life, but emotionally he is numb he/she has emotionally been detached from you, and what you both may have had together.

Codependency is a very challenging thing to go through. This disease of the heart will eliminate you from living your best self. May individuals do not realize that they have slipped in to codependency, some individual are in denial of this fact not knowing the signs and some knowing the signs. Codependency is extremely unhealthy.  You as a codependent began to lose site of whom you are, your values in life reduce, and you become after sometime like your addict. You will pic up on unhealthy life styles. You as a codependent place your power in your addict making him/her the source of your love and happiness..It may appear that you are experiencing some sort of intense love for your addict, but “needing” another person often extend from fear, not love.

In a codependent relationship the help’s emotional enmeshment leads  them to keenly feel their addicts struggles and to feel guilt at the thought of limiting their help or terminating the relationship. This motivates you to reduce the others suffering (and you own) As a codependent you tend to love your position as a rescuer, supporter, and confidante. Keep in mind your addict is smarter than you want him to be.

# DETACH WITH LOVE

 

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